


(The Failure of) Honorable Detective Hummels

by meggiewrites



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Boys In Love, Crack?, FC Bayern München, M/M, Mostly Mats being Annoying but a Good Friend lbr, Relationship Reveal, Thomas is a little shit, could be read as crack I guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-23
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-28 05:41:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16717505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meggiewrites/pseuds/meggiewrites
Summary: Maybe, just maybe, Thomas hasn't been as careful as he should have been while texting his boyfriend. And maybe, Mats might have seen some texts that he shouldn't have seen.Or, Mats tries out to find out who Thomas is dating. Pretty unsuccessfully.





	(The Failure of) Honorable Detective Hummels

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a drabble request prompt on tumblr! It turned out to be .... longer than I expected, so it's now its own little thing.

For the past ten minutes, ever since boarding the plane, Thomas has been carefully eyeing Manuel out of the corner of his eye. He’s sitting on the other side of the aisle, just a few rows ahead of him. A few strands of his hair have fallen out of his usually so uniform hairdo, covering his forehead in a way that makes him look decidedly more boyish (and adorable) than usual.

It’s a good look, Thomas thinks, as he fondly observes the goalkeeper’s head lolling to the side as he visibly struggles with staying awake. Thomas knows they slightly overdid it last night, but they’d both been pumped from the win, too giddy to sleep, too in love to let go of each other.

On his other side, in the window seat, Mats is talking constantly. Usually he doesn’t particularly need Thomas to acknowledge him much, but now, Thomas flinches when his friend unceremoniously pokes his side, glaring at him.

“Why can’t you appreciate my sense of humor?” 

He sounds genuinely offended, but Thomas knows it’s only a means to an end. Mats always craves attention and usually whines when he doesn’t get it.

Thomas shoots him a toothy grin as he tries to temporarily ban any thoughts about his blond adonis from his mind.

“Well Hummels, if you were actually funny, that wouldn’t be a problem now, would it.”

Mats huffs and crosses his arms in front of his chest, turning away from Thomas and staring vacantly out of the small oval window instead. Thomas fondly shakes his head and instead pulls out his phone, snapping a quick, private photo of Manuel before pulling up their whatsapp chat.

_Looking very cute there Spatz ♡_

They don’t text sappy nonsense that often, but somehow, in that moment, a fondness for his boyfriend surges through Thomas that he couldn’t even really describe. He longs to hold his hand and curses Leon who had asked their captain to sit next to him. He shakes his head at the next message he sends, but he can’t help it.

_It’s probably stupid but I miss you and I really want to hold your hand right now_

God, and to know that usually, Manu is the clingy one – but sometimes even a Thomas Müller can’t help being terribly sappy. 

He startles when someone clears their throat right next to his ear. Mats is peering over his shoulder and right onto his phone screen.

“Who is ‘Nunu’? And why are you sending lovey-dovey texts to someone at all; didn’t you say you were single?”

In fact, Thomas hasn’t said anything. Sure, Mats knows him and Lisa have been separated for a while, but he never answered whenever the defender asked him about his relationship status or if there was anyone he had his eyes on.

It’s not exactly like they particularly don’t want him to know or anything – but despite probably denying it on his deathbed, Mats Hummels is quite the blabbermouth, and informing him of his relationship with their captain would ultimately equal to letting the entire team know as well.

So Thomas sighs, pocketing his phone hopefully before Mats has time to recognize the probably familiar status image. Then he puts on a lazy grin.

“Has no one ever told you that it isn’t nice to disrespect people’s privacy?” the mischief in his voice does the rest of the job.

Mats throws up his hands, but he’s grinning. Well, at least he doesn’t seem too cross that Thomas hasn’t told him that he’s in fact been seeing someone.

“Alright, alright, don’t tell me. I will eventually find out by myself, anyway.”

To that, Thomas only groans.

 

It’s only two weeks later that Mats almost walks in on them making out. Thomas had Manu pressed against the tiled wall – a very reckless decision to make, he’s very much aware, but both of them, upon realizing that they were the last ones under the shower, having sent each other heated glances ever since for over an hour now, really weren’t able to help it.

Somehow, they managed to spring far enough apart that Mats doesn’t even cast Manu (water running over his shoulders, facing the wall so you can’t see his predicament or his heated cheeks) a single glance before giving Thomas a once-over with a lewd smirk firmly fixed on his face.

Thomas, still wondering how Manuel even managed to get the shower turned on before Mats came into sight – he blames it on his goalkeeper reflexes – is standing in the middle of the room, his … excitement …clearly visible, his breath short.

Mats whistles. “Been thinking about your girl, haven’t we?” he grins before winking at him, picking up his shampoo bottle from where he’d left it on the ground and leaving again.

Manu’s eyes are unfocused when he turns back to Thomas, but by his frown it’s crystal clear that the mood is truly and entirely killed. “Girl?”

The younger one only shrugs. “He caught me texting you a while ago. Apparently he’s now on the hunt to find out who my 'mystery girlfriend' is.”

Manu only snorts before he takes his hand, leaning in for a last peck.

 

A few days later, it happens again. This time, they’re sitting on Thomas’ couch, with Manu’s back leaning against Thomas’ chest, Thomas’ arms wrapped around his broad shoulders, occasionally nosing his hair as they’re watching TV, when they hear someone barge through the entrance door. 

Thomas curses under his breath. His gate has a code that only his friends know about, but he really should start to lock the door nevertheless. Manu of course has already pulled away, settling at the other side of the couch with wide eyes.

Mats, of course, doesn’t seem even mildly surprised seeing their captain in Thomas’ home, but instead, he’s frowning at him.

“Didn’t you say your bae was gonna come over today?”

Thomas groans. He did indeed, two days ago, after endless pestering from his curly-haired friend, admit that him and his mysterious partner did in fact intend to spend a quiet night together in a couple days time, just in the hopes that he’d let it go.

“And why, dare I ask, did you come over knowing I’d likely be spending quality time with my significant other?”

At least Mats has the decency to look slightly sheepish. He gnaws at his bottom lip, huffs, then offers an apologetic shrug.

“Sorry. Cathy took the kiddo to her friend and I was really bored. Could I maybe join your movie night?”

Thomas sighs while Manu rolls his eyes so hard that it looks like it must hurt.

“Sure.”

It’s relieving to see that Manu looks just as displeased as Thomas feels when Mats plops his butt down right between them, turning towards the TV with a content grin. Especially when still, he hasn’t fessed up to the fact that he does have an ulterior motive.

 

The third time it happens, Thomas is at the end of his tether. He doesn’t know exactly how and why Mats chose to drive halfway through the city just to bump into them on their daily morning run, clearly having the same idea, but honestly, what’s enough is enough.

“Are you actually following me?” he asks, and he can feel the exasperation in his voice that, even when Mats can be annoying on a normal day as well, usually isn’t there.

Mats blinks at him, and Manu, on his left, snorts.

“Actually I was not, no. Hi, Mull – Manu.” 

Manu offers him a short nod, and Thomas only huffs. For about three minutes, they run side by side, and it strangely starts to feel like a small, private training session, just with both Mats and Thomas being uncharacteristically quiet, until Mats finally opens his mouth again.

“You know, you probably wouldn’t feel like I stalked you if you actually acted like a friend normally would and told me about the person you’re seeing who you’re clearly very in love with.”

Okay. Okay, that isn’t really what Thomas expected. He looks at Manu, but Manu only shrugs. He looks strangely unbothered by this whole thing, in fact, there’s a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

But Mats isn’t finished yet. “And I know you probably have a good reason for not telling me, I just find it strange that I’ve never seen a pic of her or heard you talk about her or even mention her or anything!”

Thomas sighs. He runs a hand through his damp curls – it’s quite foggy, and the wetness is sticking to his hair like glue. He looks at Manu again. His boyfriend offers him a shy nod. 

Thomas smacks his lips.

“I do talk about my significant other quite a bit, to be honest. And we spend most of our time together.”

The puzzled look on Mats’ face is worth all the annoyance he had to suffer through the past few weeks.

“What–” he wants to ask, but Thomas cuts him off.

“Actually, we’re spending time together right now. Just as we were that evening when you barged in on our date night.”

He can see the gears in Mats’ mind turning, but somehow, he doesn’t seem to figure it out. In fact, he looks thoroughly confused. After another turn and a few more agonizing seconds, Thomas throws his hands up in exasperation before turning to Manuel. 

At first, he wants to lean in to kiss him, but then he remembers just in time where they are. (Sure, the park is mostly deserted, but at the same time, they’re still in public.) So he just sighs one last frustrated sigh, throws an arm over Manuel’s shoulders in what could be a completely platonic gesture.

“There. Here’s my boyfriend, Mats, and he has been here all along.”

Actually, seeing Mats gape at them with what can only be described as shock is probably the best moment in Thomas’ entire life.

“You’re kidding,” he says.

But before Thomas has time to reply, Manu softly shakes his head and gently covers Thomas’ hand where it’s resting on his shoulder with his own.

“He really isn’t.”

And well, then, the only thing that’s left for Mats to do is let out an incredulous cackle.

“Well, fuck me!”

Manu’s grin is quite shiteating. “Sorry, not interested. I’m taken.”

And well, that makes Thomas laugh too.

 

**Author's Note:**

> To be honest, I don't think this one is actually good enough for a standalone thing. I'm at a really weird place with my writing where I have so many things I want to write and mostly really enjoy myself doing it, especially with Neuller as I've really been falling more and more for them, but I also feel like I'm spamming the tag with this ship and should probably stop imposing. 
> 
> Idk, I guess I'll try to branch out more in the future, write those fics on my list that are about different ships ... hopefully, there are some of you who enjoyed this nevertheless.
> 
> Thanks for reading, guys. 
> 
> I write FICTION about real people. None of this is intended to harm them or their reputation in any way – [tumblr](http://manuelmueller.tumblr.com/)


End file.
